9/7/2012 6:00:00 AM Wisdom is knowing when
to keep one's mouth shut
Dianne Wilson Faith Columnist
Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles. (Proverbs 21:23)
When I saw my article in the Kingman Daily Miner of June 8, 2012, about leaving other people's business to other people, I laughed myself silly. My own article was precisely what I needed to read during a full-blown relapse in the area of what I often refer to as "co-dependency from hell."
I hadn't been with my 2,000-mile-away daughter, her husband and children for an entire year, and I was on the last leg of a month-long visit.
Enjoying tremendous success for nearly two-thirds of my stay in their home regarding the biting of my tongue and really keeping my mouth shut, I began to boast only a little mind you and to preen my feathers. Indeed, I had made a splendid effort to refrain from proffering unsolicited advice.
Picture, if you will, a working Mom and Dad, three teenagers (one of whom is a visiting cousin), a two-year-old, and two giant canines (to include a 150-pound blind Mastiff puppy), along with Grandma and Grandpa, cozied under one roof designed to shelter a small family.
This during a whirlwind of continuous activity at the close of the school term: concerts, recitals, school play, and a mélange of high-school graduation events.
"Has the baby been fed?" I would ask, and my question typically elicited an "I don't know." (I'm going to write another article about that one!) No excuse, I know, but you guessed it, I fell down miserably and began to mind everybody's business but my own. The harder I tried to abstain from commenting, about everything, the worse it got until not only my family couldn't stand me, but I couldn't stand being around myself.
I thank God for His Holy Word that lights the way. I thank Him for the people He's placed before me, whether I like it or not, who are quick to reveal my shortcomings; I thank God for the priceless gift of forgiveness, and I thank the Kingman Daily Miner for a needed reminder that I'm just a grain of sand, one among many of us humans who never get to be done.
My husband likes to say, "When I wake up in the morning, I know I'm not done yet." Though I continue to hoe my garden, those weeds like to pop up from behind, and always when least expected.
So, whenever I think I've got my mouth and my pride under control, it might just be time for a tune-up, maybe even an overhaul, remembering Proverbs 16:18 - "Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall."
@Dianna Wilson Your letter should give inspiration to us all. As parents, that parental part of us always remains.
No amount of time warp will change that portion of me. At one time my children adsorbed every word I spoke and took it all in, as fact. That ended several years earlier, now I learn from them. Life, has shown me, I have two ears, two eyes and one mouth, I still mix them up and ever so often, that still gives me a problem from time to time. Point being, each of my children is their own person, with just a portion of "me" in-tacked, within them and for that, I give thanks.
Once again Ms. Wilson, you letter reminds to look beyond the sometimes obvious, If asked I will give, if not I will enjoy the not so obvious.
Posted: Friday, September 7, 2012
Article comment by:
Ruth Ann Stillwell
I am getting ready to go visit my son and new daughter in law for a couple weeks and am really glad I read this. I am printing it out and taking it with me to remind me.. Thank you