Older Than Dirt: Road Trips with Sister - Getting There is Half the Fun

So, there we were on our way to the casino in Laughlin. Nothing really new for us, but one of the fun trips we take a few times a month, providing the funds are available.

Depending on who is doing the driving, just getting into the car can often be a dilemma. If my son is driving, the seat will be pushed back to accommodate his long legs. Therefore, there is not a lot of leg room for whomever is behind him. If my daughter-in-law is driving, the seat will remain close as she does not have legs like a basketball player.

I would normally take the seat behind the short legs, and Sister would of course be behind the long legs. These decisions must be handled before we get into the car.

Once we are seated in our proper places, Sister will soon begin commenting on how SHE is always seated on the side where all the sun comes in. Even though the windows are adequately tinted, she still feels the sun on her, and that is cause for discomfort. She can often be seen holding both her hands over the side of her face to reflect the sun.

If we are lucky enough that our driving direction actually changes the sun to MY side, that will often quiet her down. By the way, Sister wants to get a tan, but cannot be in the direct sun for more than two minutes! Thus, her skin is the same shade of white it was when she lived in Washington state.

Shortly into the drive, I will reach over and smack her hands. She will tell me, "I wasn't biting my nails, I just had this small piece that was crooked and I needed to smooth it out." Usually, my daughter-in-law will then offer her a nail file to fix the problem, to which her standard answer is, "No, I don't use those."

Please note that the smacking of the hands is because Sister wants her fingernails to grow, but often forgets and chews them off. Actually, I do believe she rips them off as quick as they grow!

As our journey continues, Sister will then tell me that she is hungry. I will ask her why she did not eat before we left. Her response will often be, "I don't know."

Mind you, she is never just hungry. If she is hungry, she is usually starving! My son may ask her if she would like him to stop somewhere and she can grab something to eat. Her standard answer is, "No! I am not that hungry."

As our drive continues, my daughter-in-law is famous for seeing donkeys off to the side of the road. I know they are out there because my son also sees the donkeys. Sister and I have actually only seen one, and still are not sure if it actually WAS a donkey, or perhaps an oddly shaped cactus.

It is not at all unusual for Sister to see a dead animal on the road. She is certain that it is a cat or dog. Of course, she does calm down after my son reassures her that it is the remnants of a recap tire from a truck! This is often followed by a large sigh of relief.

Each and every time, Sister will comment about how beautiful the river looks and how everyone seems to be having such a good time in the water. My son will then remind her that whenever she wants to go, they would gladly take her to spend some time in the water. To which she replies, "It is too hot. I think I just like looking at it."

As we near Laughlin, I remind sister that if she wins anything good, make sure and find me to give me her ticket! If I do not hold onto it she will undoubtedly put it back, and confess later on that she screwed up again!

As we arrive at our destination and step from the car, sister will look down at what she is wearing. She will then say, "I should have worn another top. This one is too hot" followed by "Do these shorts make my legs look bad?" We will all reassure her that she looks absolutely perfect! This usually seems to help.

Once we have left the parking garage, it is but a quick trip on the elevator to the casino floor. It would seem that Sister can still do stairs, but it is I who needs the elevator. Of course she will ask, "What floor do I push?" while she is looking at the words CASINO FLOOR that are right next to the number.

Traveling with people by car can often be tough on the nerves. Traveling with Sister is more like stand up comedy. The 45-minute trip goes by very quickly. Not everyone can be so entertaining just by being who they are.