Dear Abby: I am a 64-year-old widow who lost my husband 5 1/2 years ago. I became reacquainted with a former classmate at a high school reunion, and we started dating.
One night, I let him stay over because he was going to go to church with me the next morning. He lives 45 minutes away. My son drove by (intentionally), saw his car and confronted us at church in front of people. He walked up to my friend and said, “Well, how did you enjoy your sleepover at my mother’s house last night?” This was the first time they had ever met!
Their bitterness toward each other has escalated, and now my son has given me an ultimatum: Choose between his family or my friend. He has my only grandchildren.
I am so depressed, I don’t know what to do. I don’t want my son dictating my life, but I want to see my grandchildren. They truly are the most important people in my life. I could break up with my friend, but then my son would think he won. Any thoughts? – So, So Sad
Dear Sad: You are all adults. Your son was a mile out of line to do what he did.
This is not a question of winning or losing. For your own sake, you must not allow him to tell you how to conduct your personal life.
Dear Abby: I am getting married soon to the best guy ever, and I couldn’t be more excited. My older sister is my maid of honor, and she has been doing an amazing job with the planning of my bachelorette party, showers, etc.
Two years ago, my sister was engaged to a man named “Sean.” Six months before their wedding, Sean broke the engagement without warning, and along with it, my sister’s and my family’s hearts. About a month ago, they decided to get back together and are trying to make things work.
My fiance and I have decided not to invite Sean to our wedding. Is it selfish to exclude him from our nuptials? How should we tell my sister? – Selfish in the West
Dear Selfish: I’m glad you asked. While it’s your right as the bride to exclude whomever you choose, it would be selfish and I strongly advise you – for the sake of future family harmony – not to do this.
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