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Thu, Jan. 23

Dear Abby | Girlfriend wonders when it’s time to mention her implants

Dear Abby: I have been in a relationship with a very special man who is five years younger. We met on an online dating site and have been seeing each other for several years. We are well suited for each other and very much in love. We have now decided to live together, with the possibility of marriage if it won’t jeopardize our retirement incomes.

My dilemma is I have breast implants. I had the surgery 20 years ago when I was newly widowed and about to start dating again. I never told any of the men I dated, and I don’t believe anyone suspected. My breasts look and feel natural and they have enhanced my love life tremendously.

Now that this relationship is serious, I wonder if I need to tell my guy. If he leaves after I tell him, then I guess he wasn’t The One. I’d prefer not to say anything. I’ve had the implants so long, I feel they are part of me, not something foreign in my body. I am afraid he may have an altered opinion of my body after I tell him. Please advise. – Old, But Not Dead

DEAR O.B.N.D.: If you really believe he’d leave you after several years together because you told him you have breast implants, then he really isn’t the man for you. I think you should level with him, because if one of the implants should need an “adjustment” or replacement, he will find out then and may resent the fact that you hadn’t told him.

Dear Abby: My wife passed away six years ago. I have finally reached a point where I’m ready to not be alone anymore. The problem is I’m interested in one of her sisters. I love and care for the whole family, and it would devastate me to lose them by revealing it. Am I way off base to even think of pursuing it? Should I drop it or talk with her to find out her thoughts? Maybe I shouldn’t try because it’s not “normal,” but I am interested in the possibility. – Forbidden Love in Texas

Dear Forbidden Love: This situation isn’t as unusual as you may think. In biblical times, when a woman lost her husband, it was expected that his brother would marry her. If your late wife’s sister is single, tell her how you feel. You have known her long enough that those feelings may or may not be mutual – but no law says you can’t find out.

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