Dear Abby | Unhappy wife is loathe to be first in her family to divorce
Dear Abby: I am an attractive woman who has been married for 30 years. I think my husband has been cheating on me for most of them. Through the years I have seen the telltale signs and confronted him many times. But he continually tells me no, he would never do anything.
You see, my parents were married for 62 years, and I have two sisters and three brothers who have never been divorced or separated. So I’d feel like a failure if I left him.
I need to know for sure whether he has cheated, but I don’t know how to prove it. My friends say if it walks and quacks, it is a duck. Advice? – Suspicious in the South
Dear Suspicious: If you feel you need to have proof that your husband is being or has been unfaithful, and has lied to you all these years, then hire a private detective and you will probably get what you are looking for. You have my sympathy.
Dear Abby: I’m 13, and I have had a few problems with my boyfriend’s family. I got him in trouble a few times, and I feel really bad about it, even though I’m not a bad person.
I tried to talk to his mother, but I have the feeling they don’t particularly like me even though she says she has nothing against me. I know my boyfriend’s older sister doesn’t like me and doesn’t want me and her brother to be together.
We are now being forced to break up until he is respectful enough to have a girlfriend, even though he is very respectful. I feel like this all revolves around me, and I want to get his family to know the real me and give me another chance. What should I do? – Forced To Break Up in Mississippi
Dear Forced To Break Up: Thirteen is young for a serious romance, and your boyfriend’s family may be worried that you are trying to rush him into a relationship for which he isn’t ready. For now, the smart move would be to put some distance between you and your boyfriend.
If you stand any chance of improving your standing with his family, a step in the right direction would be to concentrate your efforts on becoming someone they can respect – a good student, active in a youth group or sports activity. If they can see a positive change in you, they may be more receptive to your being in his life. And if they don’t, your time won’t have been wasted because you will have become a more successful person.