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6:59 PM Fri, Jan. 18th

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Will Durst

Stories by Will

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Column | Long live King Donald

The argument is the president cannot commit obstruction of justice, because as chief law enforcement officer of the United States, he is the justice department. King Donald.

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Column | Oval Office Apprentice

You won’t want to miss Season 3. But don’t worry, you won’t be able to.

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Column | Trump’s hair: An analysis

Normally, focusing on a person’s physical characteristics is considered out of bounds, and just not cricket, but because Donald Trump’s favorite weapon is denigration, we’ve decided to play by his rules.

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Column | A few choice words about Mueller’s investigation

Traditionally, the present for a first anniversary is paper, but you don’t need any more of that, considering the voluminous file cabinets full of documents already collected and stashed in triple-locked, humidity-controlled warehouses all over the leaky swamp that is Washington.

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Column | Easter and the rites of spring

Easter is a most peculiar holiday, which is saying something, considering so many other religious festivities litter our calendar.

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Column | Ways Democrats could screw up the midterms

Okay, Democrats, settle down. Drop the confetti and back away from the champagne. Stop punching each other in the arm, making with the whoop-whoop noises.

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Column | Reign of Error: Based on 2017, we’re in for a bumpy 2018

It’s been quite a year, the exact reverse of that whole “time flies when you’re having fun” thing.

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Column | No means no. It doesn’t mean, ‘maybe’

An avalanche of revelations concerning public figures engaging in various sexual assaults has tumbled down upon our heads

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Column | Insults That Threaten Future Generations

Considering the severity of the cascade of disasters descending upon us lately, we should thank our lucky stars we’re able to talk about them.

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Column | What Trump Says vs. What Trump Means

Most presidents try to avoid controversy by painstakingly parsing their words like a fifth grader conserving an allowance at the county fair.

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Guest Column: Trump Loves Executive Orders Even More Than Obama

Donald J Trump has many tools at his disposal.

Column: Snowflakes Want Me To Be Nicer

I need to stop and thank all the nice folk who’ve been kind enough to take time from their busy schedules to provide this column with some constructive criticism.

Guest Column: President Braggadocio Fires a Showboat

The firing of FBI Director James Comey by the president of the United States slammed Washington.

Guest Column: President Trump Stress Disorder - An Epidemic Sweeping The Nation

An epidemic is sweeping the nation, causing sufferers to experience feelings of hopeless doom, certain annihilation and cataclysmic collapse.

Guest Column: Report Card on Trump’s First 100 Days

It seems like decades since Barack Obama handed the keys to the country over to the House of Trump, but that was only at the end of January, barely 3 months ago.

Column: Bad hair wars between Trump and North Korea

Enterprising entrepreneurs out there might want to invest in a fleet of tractor backhoes and partial ownership of a limestone quarry because it’s starting to look like bunker-digging time in America.

Column: A Covey of Political Caucuses

During the Trump Care Meltdown, when the same Republicans that chanted “Repeal & Replace” for seven years folded like a broken down lawn chair in a category 5 hurricane, we learned about a couple mysterious Republican Congressional Caucuses instrumental in torpedoing the AHCA.

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Column: Good riddance to bad rubbish

It is our fervent hope here at Durstco that all you loyal readers join us in welcoming the elixir of opportunity that is 2017 and pray that it goes down smoother than that most recently departed year whose name has been wiped from our memory banks.

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Column: The Christmas gifts you didn’t get but totally deserved

Relax. Now breathe. And repeat. The nonstop madcap insanity has finally reached its red and green holiday crescendo and its all downhill from here.

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Column: Republicans are the masters of not getting over things

And now a few choice words for all Republicans advising Democrats to “stop whining about the election and get over it.”

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Column: The Top 10 comedic news stories of 2016

It’s the first week of December, and all over the nation children dance while grandparents twitch with anticipation. Which, admittedly, isn’t that out of the ordinary.

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Column: Presidential Apprentice: learning the ropes

Two months before joining the government in an entry level position, President-elect Donald Trump has been learning the ropes and is busier than a bartender ten minutes before midnight at a Times Square Applebee’s on New Year’s Eve.

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Column: The bright side of a Donald Trump presidency

Well. That happened. Donald J. Trump didn’t just perplex the pundits, pollsters and his own progeny with a stunning electoral pummeling of Hillary Clinton, he pelted them with showbiz shock and awe.

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October surprises await as days dwindle for Trump and Hillary

Something craven infects political candidates as the days dwindle down to a precious few.

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Welcome to the Health Wars

We, the American People, should pat ourselves on the back for having survived a multitude of presidential battles this year.

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Column: The American people can’t be trusted

So the conventions are over and we’ve entered the penultimate stage of this presidential demolition derby.